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Live Wire #7 // All In

You can read this transmission or you can listen to it for added impact. There is a rhythm, an acoustic element to my words, so Click here for the full shebang. Plus, I'm cute.

I have nowhere else to be.

I have nowhere else to be.

For the last couple years, that’s been my mantra when I’m on a tough bike ride. Pedaling slow, trying to get up a hill, trying to just keep going. It’s rhythmic. Patient.

I have nowhere else to be.

It’s helped me a lot because I used to get super anxious and despondent on a bike. I’d be slower than everyone else. Far behind. Frustrated. Down on myself. And I’d give up. I’d walk. I’d cry. I’d sit on the ground & be pissed at myself for not being good enough.

I tortured myself through comparison. Through thinking that I should be better, faster, stronger. I let my mind project me forward into the shoes of those ahead of me, and by comparison…I sucked.

But my body was actually just fine here. Moving at my own pace. In my own time. I could tackle any hill. Slowly? Yeah. But why is that wrong?

I didn’t NEED to be up ahead with them. There was no fire to put out on the other side of the ride. There was no race except for the one I created in my own head.

I have nowhere else to be.

That simple mantra allows me to do anything. Brings me out of my head & back to my body. Out of the future & into this moment. Out of a story I’m telling myself & into reality.

If I’ve got nowhere else to be…..I can stop & play for a moment. I can rest for a moment. I can settle in here. I can snuggle up next to. I can focus my scattered energy, my scattered mind, my scattered heart. On you.

If I’ve got nowhere else to be, in this very moment, then why not go slow. Why not listen to my body instead of my mind. Why not listen to my heart instead of my doubts. Why not take my time. Why not just stay here & enjoy it, whatever this is.

Biking through Death Valley this week…the mountains surround you, and they seem to share the very same message.

We have nowhere else to be.

I think this mantra extends far beyond my bike.

Playing with my nephews.

Reading a book in bed.

Truly listening to what someone’s saying.

Looking into your eyes.

Closing my eyes to breathe.

Laughing so hard at a joke.

Going for a walk.

Falling in love.

Saying goodbye.

I want to see how it feels. Not to wander. To relax into each moment that comes my way. All here. All in. Permission to stay put. To accept, come what may. To embrace this.

I have nowhere else to be.

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